Spunky Pigeon

I’m not really into bird-watching or ornithology,

But when it comes to pigeons one thing is obvious to me.

I’m not being too judgemental. I’m not saying that it’s bad.

But Ive come to the conclusion that all pigeons are sex mad!

Its like all pigeon’s sexual triggers have been set to automatic,

Wherever you may be, all you can see, are pigeons going at it.

They call them homing pigeons, but wherever they may roam

The one thing they don’t seem to do is wait till they get home!

To the pigeon racer it would be something of a shock,

If he could see - reality - as he waits there with his clock.

Instead of flying straight and true his prize bird thinks he’d rather

Stop off on the way back home for a bit of “How’s your father!”

There don’t seem to be much etiquette from initial introduction,

Male pigeons nice to meet you involves immediate seduction.

Not for him the sweet birdsong of blackbird, skylark ,starling.

Instead they’re squeeze me- please me geezers much more “how y’ doing darling?”

Their energetic lovemaking is not an act of subtlety

Seem to prefer an audience - Hey come and look at me

Male pigeons in particular are clearly show-offy sort of fellas.

Will put on a performance just to make the sparrows jealous.

I watched 2 pigeons going at it a little while back

Having energetic sex right on the railway track

They were seemingly oblivious to the train coming down the line

Coitus interuptus by the 14:29

Even when they might be discrete taking cover in the trees

Their noisy sexual antics betrayed by falling twigs & leaves

The special sounds of Summer in an English country garden

Is the flapping desperation of a pigeon with a hard on

We shouldnt be judgemental and just let them do their thing

A Karma-sutric frenzy of feather beak and wing.

At least we know theres no danger that pigeon numbers will overcome the nation.

Its obvious they’ll all die young from excessive fornication!