TEAMS

I want to pick a football club - I want to be a fan

All the blokes at work support a team

And I want to be a man

I want to pick a football club - It’s a difficult decision

I won’t support my local team

Cos they’re in the wrong division

I want to pick a football club. I’m making my selection

I don’t think its wrong to choose a club

With which you’ve no connection

I want to pick a football club - And pretend I really care

About the city that they come from 

Even though I’m not from there

I want to pick a football club. But although Ive tried and tried

Ive never quite been able 

To find a link to Merseyside

I want to pick a football club. The tickets are quite dear

But it’s not a real problem

 I’ll just be going once a year

I want to pick a football club. And I will pretend to mourn

The tragedy of a city

Where I wasn’t even born

I want to pick a football club. I’m prepared to make excuses

For the owner’s links to criminals

Or human rights abuses

I want to pick a football club. I’m looking at the teams

I need to pick one with a shirt 

That goes with Armani Jeans

I want to pick a football club. But I don’t know the songs

But Ive watched a YouTube video 

So now I can sing along

I want to pick a football club. Where the catering’s not crap

Where I can have my half time sushi

And an avocado wrap

I want to pick a football club. The manager’s from Spain

Then Italy, then Germany

And it all goes round again

I want to pick a football club. So I can do a foreign trip

And drape my self in an England flag

And wear the latest strip

I want to pick a football club. I’m on the Glory Hunt

I’m sure the local fans are joking 

When they call me Tourist ……….Runt!

I want to pick a football club. I think Im nearly set

It’s ChelArseCity United

Cos I’m hedging all my bets!